When I come back...

Sometimes when you come from nothing
it pushes you to become everything

When I go home for my visit
I will bring back with me
a fresh connection to the world
to my roots
to family
& home

I will bring back with me
Apple Pie & Floral dresses
Friendly smiles
Simple advice
& cornbread.

I will bring with me
stories of this city
how it sparkles
stories of the girls
this city holds

Even though it's home
Night time feels too real
Too much like being small
Too much like being afraid.

When I was young & couldn't sleep
I would touch myself until I grew sleepy.
It was a strange comfort
It never felt wrong.
Anytime I was afraid of having bad dreams
I would think of someone beautiful.

I never wondered if I was strange
Only when I grew older did I ever question my actions.

Growing up I continued to look inward
Always questioning
Always looking for explainations to things I do
things I feel
things I want

Sometimes I feel very lonely
Im always looking for that kindred soul.

It's hard to know me sometimes
I am trying very hard to take down my wall.
Strangely it only goes up when someone begins to sneak in
Keeping me from getting close
to the one I want

Life is ironic that way
cruel games

I will bring back with me
a new outlook
new inspiration
new art
& new attitude
Life keeps moving
Keeps us on our toes
I love it
Keep it coming